"Child, child, have patience and belief, for life is many days, and each present hour will pass away. Son, son, you have been mad and drunken, furious and wild, filled with hatred and despair, and all the dark confusions of the soul — but so have we. You found the earth too great for your one life, you found your brain and sinew smaller than the hunger and desire that fed on them — but it has been this way with all men. You have stumbled on in darkness, you have been pulled in opposite directions, you have faltered, you have missed the way, but, child, this is the chronicle of the earth. And now, because you have known madness and despair, and because you will grow desperate again before you come to evening, we who have stormed the ramparts of the furious earth and been hurled back, we who have been maddened by the unknowable and bitter mystery of love, we who have hungered after fame and savored all of life, the tumult, pain, and frenzy, and now sit quietly by our windows watching all that henceforth never more shall touch us — we call upon you to take heart, for we can swear to you that these things pass. Child, child, child."
"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
2012 @ 02:56 / 2387 / Permalink
Mario & Vidis feat. Ernesto - Changed, made me cry
The time comes to go deeper
into itself and the times comes
when it is more innocent
or easier to die
like bombers over
and I remember
laying there in the sand,
myself 20 years old,
because the name sounded good
and being vaguely excited by something
that was not myself
and closing the book
sick of the sea
and the sky
blue blue blue
spots of white,
all dizzy in the trap,
I was nailed
like the sand-fleas
I slapped at,
and Mr. Faulkner
laying on his side
immortal and burning
with my toes
and everything tilting and not quite true.
"Twenty one?! Twenty one is nothing. Twenty one is so young. This is your time to suck."
-David Sedaris, when I asked him if he had any advice for budding, discouraged writers
2011 @ 17:49 / 23 / Permalink
The Birthday Party
"I got tired, I told him. Not worn out, but worn through. Like one of those wives who wakes up one morning and says I can’t bake any more bread.
You never bake bread, he wrote, and we were still joking.
Then it’s like I woke up and baked bread, I said, and we were joking even then. I wondered will there come a time when we won’t be joking? And what would it look like? And how would that feel?
When I was a girl, my life was music that was always getting louder. Everything moved me. A dog following a stranger. That made me feel so much. A calender that showed the wrong month. I could have cried over it. I did. Where the smoke from the chimney ended. How an overturned bottle rested at the edge of a table.
I spent my life learning to feel less.
Every day I felt less. Is that growing old? Or is it something worse?
You cannot protect yourself from sadness without protecting yourself from happiness."
Jonathan Safran Foer
Zerkalo / The Mirror
(1975, dir. Andrei Tarkovsky)
“With an amazing regularity I keep seeing one and the same dream. It seems to make me return to the place, poignantly dear to my heart, where my grandfather’s house used to be, in which I was born 40 years ago right on the dinner table. I see this dream again and again. Each time I try to enter it, something prevents me from doing that. And when I see those walls made of logs and the dark entrance, even in my dream I become aware that I’m only dreaming it. And the overwhelming joy is clouded by anticipation of awakening.
At times something happens and I stop dreaming of the house and the pine trees of my childhood around it. Then I get depressed. And I can’t wait to see this dream in which I’ll be a child again and feel happy again because everything will still be ahead, everything will be possible…”
“’Anyway, I keep picturing all these little kids playing some game in this big field of rye and all. Thousands of little kids, and nobody’s around - nobody big, I mean - except me. And I’m standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. What I have to do, I have to catch everybody if they start to go over the cliff - I mean if they’re running and they don’t look where they’re going I have to come out from somewhere and catch them. That’s all I’d do all day. I’d just be the catcher in the rye and all.”
Catcher In The Rye, Salinger